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"I taught him his duty to God and his king,
(For precept and practice are not the same thing;)
And though the new ethics of France I admir'd,
That he should adopt them I never desir'd.
How could I expect such domestic distress,
Whose schemes philosophic my countrymen bless?
'T was I-only-who the secret found out,
That vessels should always have gills, like a trout.
Nor are my inventions confin'd to aquatics :
I've prov'd that a man may apply mathematics
With wonderful ease to the tuning pianos,
And make their tones smooth as Italian sopranos !
And booksellers, printers, and devils confess
My skill in the making of ink, type, and press..
Oh, could I invent some mechanical plan
To manage my son, that mistaken young man,
Who treats with contempt every sage proposition,
And wants dull accounts from a mathematician'
Who, when I'm extracting some root, comes to me,
;
And swears I've extracted the root of a tree.
By the powers of the lever, the pulley, the screw,
I'd raise him as high-as the pillar at Kew.”

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CHILL blew the wind through the hollow vaults of the sepulchre of St. Ines Abbey, and at every step the bones of the dead cracked beneath their footsteps. The affrighted Seraphina would fain have retreated but a frown from the bushy eyebrows of father Jeronymo, as he trimmed the nearly exhausted lamp, awed her into obedience. "Behold," said the friar, pointing to a range of coffins on the right," in these portmanteaus the bones of your ancestors, having performed their allotted pilgrimage, are packed. Unhappy maiden! driven by the incantations of Ashte

roth

roth to ask of the dead that information which the living deny thee!" As he pronounced these words, Father Jeronymo drew from his bosom a small phial of phosphorus, to which he applied a match tipped with brimstone, and in an instant the vault was illuminated with a pale blue light. Then muttering some cabalistical words to himself, and touching the coffin next to him with his crucifix, "Sir Hildebrand,” cried he aloud, "I command thee, in the name of Saint Ursula and her seven imps, to inform thy descendant Seraphina, whether she is destined to be the bride of Sir Isidore of Croatia." The coffin lid heaved with a convulsive motion, and the words Abera quinbus were heard from within; but no other sounds were uttered.. The monk shook his head, and proceeded to the next. "Bridget," cried he, with a solemn voice, after repeating the same ceremonies; "Bridget, great aunt by the mother's side of him who now sleeps a perturbed spirit on thy right hand, 1 conjure thee, in the name of the spotless St. Ursula, to inform thy great great niece Seraphina, whether she is destined to become the bride of Sir Isidore of Croatia." The coffin lid heaved, and a loud scolding noise was heard from within. Seraphina shuddered; and casting her eyes upwards, was appalled by the sight of two apes, sitting on a beam; "Be not alarmed, fair maiden," cried one of the apes; we are harmless animals, led about in hell by your great great aunt." These words were scarcely uttered, when both of these prototypes of outward man leaped from the beam, and advancing to the coffin of the deceased Bridget, forcibly tore off the lid. Instantly the vault was shaken with thunder, and the body of the immaculate Bridget sat upright in its coffin, fresh as when alive, except that the head was now become a skeleton. A thick mist of a Trafalgar colour, spread itself around the vault, and from the tomb of Bridget these words

were

were uttered" Never shall Seraphina become the bride. of Sir Isidore of Croatia, till the organ in the cathedral of Saint Ines shall cease its nocturnal melody." The two apes then leaped into the coffin, which sunk with a tremendous crash down to the Antipodes: Seraphina and the Monk were carried through the air by an invisible power, and soon found themselves in the cathedral, at the feet of the statue of Saint Ursula.

The devoted nymph stood for a while in mute despair; then clasping her lily hands together, and turning up her hazel eyes to heaven" Wretch that I am" said she, "then. I too must lead apes in the dominions of Pluto: not marry till the organ in the cathedral of St. Ines shall cease its nocturnal melody? that will never be. Too well knows my spiteful aunt, that the demon Dubbo each night takes his accursed seat in the organ-loft, entrancing the inhabitants of Sponderlitz with more than mortal melody. O Isidore! Isidore! why was I born?" The unhappy damsel here wept aloud, until the compassionate beard of Father Jeronymo was moistened with her tears.

Who can unfix the fixed decrees of fate? Can the feeble arm of a man roll back the waters of Niagara, shake the Appenines, or uproot the solid Alps? Can the cup of horn, which moistens the lips of the faithful at the shrine of Loretto, contain at once all the waters of the Atlantic deep?--I should think not!

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Night now arose, and in an elegant posture threw her black velvet mantle, spangled with stars, across the firmament, when the despairing Sir Isidore prostrated himself before the statue of Saint Ursula. His cold steel armour grew colder with despair, and the ostrich feathers in his helmet drooped despondingly, like the weeping willow which overhangeth the waters of the Danube. Suddenly, the one hundred and twentyseven tapers of the cathedral were illuminated, the beautiful

VOL. XII. .

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beautiful statue descended from its pedestal, and walked aminuet with the astonished warrior, the tune of ،، Non nobis Domine" humming from her marble lips: he retired to bed, and in dreams was assured by an indubitable prognostic of his future happiness. In the morning he saluted the good Sir Hubert and his lovely daughter with a smiling countenance: "Egad," cried the knight, as he conveyed a spoonful of hasty-pudding to his mouth, "I should not wonder if all turned out well yet : I say nothing; but mark what I do say this night the accursed fiend Dubbo shall be destroyed, and Seraphina shall be my bride." Imagine the delight of the worthy Palatine and his daughter at receiving this intelligence; it could only be equalled by their anxiety to see the prediction verified.

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Night now arose again, but in a different costume: she had discarded her black velvet mantle, and assumed a sort of gray pelisse, with a moon depicted on the shoulder. The abbey bell tolled one, and the demon Dubbo took his appointed seat in the organ-loft. Sir Isidore buckled on his steel armour inlaid with gold; and the gentle Seraphina, as she rivetted his Knee-pan with a sledge-hammer, put up vows to all the tutelary saints for his safety and deliverance. The fiend played on the instrument, and the knight sang the following song in unison:

"Demon Dubbo, Demon Dubbo,

Though thou art the devil's cub, o!

Soon this fist thy back shall drub, o!"

The venerable Sir Hubert and his daughter did not long remain in suspense. Groans saluted their ears; they were the groans of disappointed malice. The demon essayed the keys of the instrument, and no sound was returned. Again his massy and Herculean Anger rested on B flat; the organ was mute. ،، Death

and

and distraction!" cried the fiend, gnashing his teeth and biting the tip of his tail with rage; "I am undone!" Maddening with fury, he struck his foot upon the floor; the timber gave way to the unequal force, and the clatter of a more than mortal hoof was heard on the pavement beneath. Instantly, his form was dilated to an incredible size, his head burst through the roof of the chapel, and was lost in the clouds, his sable right hand eclipsing the moon. The earth rocked, the waves of the sea rose in tremendous billows, the air was rent with thunder, and the demon was lost in the flames of Mount Vesuvius.

Sir Isidore, breathless with haste, his sword red with blood, rushed into the court-yard, and folded his beloved Seraphina in his victorious arms. "Brave knight!" cried the Palatine," my daughter is yours. But tell me, I conjure you, how did you contrive to vanquish the demon Dubbo, and still his nightly serenade? Didst thou slay him?""No," answered the brave Sir Isidore; I stole behind the organ, and slew-the organ-blower ! ! !''

THE FLIGHT OF KING JOE.

[From the Morning Post, Sept. 2.]

THE new King of Spain,
Perceiving his reign

At Madrid would be dang'rous and brief,
Resolv'd, ere by night

He thence took his flight,

To perform some exploits as a-Thief

House, temple, and palace,
Of cash, cup, and chalice,

He stript, like a robber on duty-
Then ran off quite happy,
To soothe Brother Nappy,

For the loss of his Throne, with the booty.

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