BEAUTY. FROM THE PORTUGUESE OF CAMOENS. RHITMAS, V. iii. p. 53, Ed. Lifbon, 1783. THY lovely charms, celeftial maid, -What lips audacious, vain, and rafi, Oh! I can ne'er the theme attempt, Since when I fee thee, I am dumb- Temple: OLD NICK. I CERTAIN DEATH. A THOUGHT FROM THE FRENCH. SHALL die—in the height of despair, I fhall die with delight, if the fair IMPROMPTU. HUMDRUM complains his giddy wife And vows he cannot bear a life Of gaming, feasts, and plays. His lot is hard as fate can give, T.B. IMPROMPTU. A Woman finging ballads for money to bury her Huf band, gave rife to the following jeu d''efprit. FOR OR her husband deceas'd, Sally chants the fweet lay, But, I doubt, fince the fings for a dead man to-day, THE PORTRAIT. A WIFE Martin had, who was beauteous and young, But whofe charms, in effect, were deftroy'd by her tongue; It was conftantly going, nor ever would ceafe, And depriv'd the poor fellow of all hopes of peace. And a burden it is, which few mortals can bear. Her portrait was drawn by an eminent painter, Whofe performance was not than the original fainter; The eyes, nofe, and mouth, were fo ftrictly from Nature, Of her tongue again going, he stopp'd both his ears. C FEATHERS. G. B. At a rout where the ladies' heads were profufely decorated with feathers, the following repartee took place: "WHAT would you do," one day fays my Lord to a wit, "Should your wife thus with feathers equip her?" "Why, nothing, my Lord, but what manners permit I'd just take the freedom to trip her!". THE RETORT. FAN thought, t' other day, that with Con fhe'd be witty, She faid Con was frightful-'t was very uncivil, PRO. INSCRIPTION INSCRIPTION FOR A MONUMENT AT OLD SARUM. [From the Suffex Chronicle.] READER, if thou canft boaft the noble name Read, and be envious !-Doft thou fee yon hut, In England it is order'd, that the laws Which bind the people, from theinfelves should spring; That wretched hovel, to the Senate fends WHO, HOW, AND WHEN. AN INSCRIPTION FOR A GREAT HOUSE. OLD families of yesterday we fhew, And Lords, whofe fathers were-the Lord knows who. As fure as Bos is Ox, and Sus is Sow, Here Lords have Lords become-the Lord knows how. Such Lords they are, that not one Lord in ten Will act as Lords fhould act-the Lord knows when! SIR, PAROLES AND COUNTER SIGNS. [From the Morning Chronicle] AT the prefent important crifis, when the country is threatened by an infolent and atrocious invader; when life, liberty, property, laws, focial order, and religion; every thing which conftitutes public happinefs and private felicity, every thing which is our boast as Britons, or is dear to us as men, is fo imme diately diately and imminently in danger, it becomes the duty of every man to make a tender of his fervices, of however feeble a nature they may be, in the general caufe. In fuch a fituation, it is with forrow I perceive that the inexorable hand of Time has utterly deprived these ftiffening limbs of mine of all power to spring through the rapid motions of the fugle-man, or even to trail a pike in the service: "But what I can, I will." And whilft I look round me, and behold the patriotifm and energies of my country difplaying themselves with a luftre hitherto unequalled in its hiftory; as I caft my eye towards that monument of public fpirit, the subfcription at Lloyd's, where the patriots at the commencement of the nineteenth century will have their names recorded in letters of gold-of paper, I mean: when I there find even contractors' footmen contributing their half-crowns for the fupport of the Conftitution; and the Cambro-British virgins employed in the neighbourhood of Brentford clubbing their fixpences, in order to protect their virtue from violation -I do confefs that I feel myfelf emboldened to hope that even my mite will meet its due acceptance; and it is in this hope that I now beg leave, through the medium of your paper, to make a tender of it againft our common enemy. It is, I believe, generally understood, that, the better to enable the unfettered hands of Minifters to act up to their great conceptions, by putting at fuller liberty the disposable force of the country, the volunteer corps of the metropolis at least will be employed on garrison duty at the Tower, and in mounting guard at Saint. James's, &c. &c. Now, Sir," I do humbly propose to fupply the aforefaid gentlemen within the bills of mortality (I hope there is nothing ominous in the word) with the parole and counterfign, which in the discharge of fuch duty will be neceffarily called for." It has been afferted of an able General, who, during our late conflict, commanded the enemy's forces in the neighbourhood of Dunkirk, that one great mean by which he contrived to infpirit his troops, was by preferving a ftudied point, as applicable to the occafion, in the reciprocal relation of these terms, as delivered from head-quarters. I have endeavoured therefore, as much as lies within my power, to keep the fame object in view; and I have the moft confident hope, that if thefe gentlemen fhould have their beft energies called upon for a more decifive fervice, the fame means may be equally fuccefsful on this fide of the water, in repelling the desperate disturber of our prefent happinefs. I tranfmit the following lift as a fpecimen, which will be an ample provifion for one month's fervice at leaft. With a fimilar fupply, when thefe are fairly expended, I fhall do my best to be prepared. And, in the mean time, I remain yours, &c. &c. Chapter Coffee-houje. PAROLE. Time is ! Time's paft! X. X. COUNTERSIGN. Bragge's a good Dog March to Paris British Navy The old Rock of St. Vin-1 The Statue. The Brazen Head. Property Tax. Darkness vifible. Entrench at Blackheath. Attention! }{ The Mud-larks ofthe Dockyards. |