America; and that I shall through future life be everafter sorry that I did not obey. Many thanks to you, my dear brother, for your faithful and affectionate advice; and although I cannot, dare not follow it, this I trust shall never sever the strong bonds of friendship which have so long subsisted between us. Love to * * * I remain, dear Sir, your most affectionate, but weak and unworthy brother in Jesus Christ, J. C. LETTER II. My dear Brother, TO THE SAME. Essex, Vt., U. S., August, 1840. No! I cannot say I have any serious objections against relating to you the circumstances which led me to this singular decision. I would have done so in my last; but I felt a hesitancy to tell you in the simplicity of my heart those severe exercises of mind connected with it. I knew your cool and metaphysical turn of mind so well, that I feared to open a new field for your speculative genius. It is likely my simple story will excite your incredulity more than ever! " strange," you will say, "that a man of sense, and a Minister of God, should suffer himself for such a small affair to be tossed like a ball into a far country: or, that he should suppose such great effects would be connected with such insignificant causes, that the infinite God should stoop, to bring about such important events, from means so small and paltry!" To this I answer, man always proportions his means to his ends. He seeks to accomplish great designs by great means. With him, the cause must always be commensurate with the intended effects. On the contrary, God has ever delighted to humble the pride of man, by bringing about the greatest events by the smallest instrumentality. When disposed to smile at the trivial matter which arrested my mind, and which prepared it to take such an unusual course, I wish you would reflect on that verse you have heard me repeat, and which you so much admire: "A pebble in the streamlet scant, Has turn'd the course of many a river. A dew-drop on the baby plant, You will remember our Conference of 1839, was held in the City of Schenectady, N. Y. That year I was appointed to Whitehall, N. Y. Shortly after, I had my library and study furniture forwarded to my station. It was then I began seriously to reflect upon the propriety of choosing a wife, believing that "marriage is honourable in all men:" I had travelled a number of years; studied hard, and expended all my time and strength in winning souls to Christ. My brethren approved of my intention. But while indulging in this purpose, for some reasons I could not explain, my heart became very hard. The Lord seemed to depart from me, and that countenance which had so often beamed upon me from above, and had daily, for many years, brightened my soul into rapturous joy, appeared now to be mantled in the thickest gloom. The more I reflected thus-" I can see no good reason why I should be singular among my brethren, nor continue to lead this solitary life;" my heart became harder, and my darkness increased. I was soon involved in a variety of evil reasonings.—My will seemed to be in a conflict with something invisible.-God who had honoured me with such intimate communion with himself since my conversion, apparently left me to battle it out alone. So it appeared to me then; but now I see God himself was contending with me. I was about to step out of the order of his Providence; and He was resolved to prevent it, unless I should refuse to understand why he thus resisted me. Had I continued the conflict, I believe he would have let me take my own course, nor would he have cast me off; yet, I solemnly feel, he would have severely chastised my disobedience. My distress and gloom were so great, I could not unpack my library, nor arrange my study. I began to reflect most solemnly upon my unhappy state of mind, and became more concerned to regain my former peace and joy in God, than to obtain any temporal blessing whatever. The world was a blank→ a bleak and howling wilderness to my soul, without the smiles of my Saviour.-In fact, that I could not live, but must wither away from the face of the earth, without his comforting and satisfying presence. Like a well-chastised son, I came back to the feet of my Heavenly Father, and with many tears I besought him to reveal his face to my soul: that if my purposes were crossing his, to show me; and whatever was his will, I would at once, by his help, yield my soul unto it. "Lord God" I said-" if my will crosses thy will, then my will must be wrong; for thine cannot but be right." Now I cared not what he commanded me to do, or to leave undone, I stood ready to obey. I felt assured clear light from God on some points would soon reach my soul; and I was fully prepared for it; but I no more expected such an order as came soon after, than I expected He would command me to fly upward and preach the gospel in another planet. During three days I cried to God, without any answer. On the third day, in the afternoon, I obtained an audience with the Lord. The place was almost as lonely as Sinai, where Moses saw the burning bush. It was under open sky, a considerable distance from the habitations of men-steep rocks and mountains; deep forests, and venomous reptiles surrounded me. Here, and in a moment, the following passage was given me to plead :-And the Lord descended in the cloud, and stood with him there, and proclaimed the name of the Lord. And the Lord passed by before him, and proclaimed, The Lord, The Lord God, merciful and gracious, longsuffering, and abundant in goodness and truth; keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, and that will by no means clear the guilty.—Exod. xxxiv. 5, 6, 7. I took hold of this; many of the words were as fire, and as a hammer to break the rocks in pieces before the Lord. The fountains of tears were opened, and the great deep of my heart was broken up. I left the place however, without receiving any light; but my heart was fully softened and subdued, and I felt assured I had prevailed in some way with God. I was confident light and direction were coming; but of what nature I could not tell. This was on the 9th of July, 1839. The same evening, about twilight; eternal glory be to God; when reading in a small room adjoining my study, a light, as I conceived from heaven, reached me. My soul was singularly calmed and warmed by a strange visitation. In the moment I recognised the change; the following, in substance, was spoken to my heart; but in a manner, and with a rapidity I cannot possibly describe-Every ray of divine glory seemed to be a word, that the eye of my soul could read-a sentence which my judgment could perceive and understand :-"These matters which trouble thee, must be let entirely alone. The will of God is that thou shouldest visit Europe. shall be with thee there, and give thee many seals He to thy ministry. He has provided thee with funds. Make thy arrangements accordingly; and next Conference ask liberty from the proper authorities, and it shall be granted thee. Visit Canada first; when this is done, sail for England. God shall be with thee there, and thou shalt have no want in all thy journeyings, and thou shalt be brought back in safety again to America.” The above is far beneath the dignity and grandeur of the revelation. It came in a way which left no room for a doubt. A heavenly calm-a powerful persuasion—and an intense glow of divine love, accompanied the whole. It was like the breaking forth of the noon-day sun at midnight. I fell upon my knees before the Lord, my whole mind consenting to the orders, which I believed had come from heaven! Oh! the sweetness of that communion I then enjoyed with God. My sky was cloudless. My rest of soul unutterable. The meaning of many past providences were now explained. The possession of a few hundreds of dollars had often made me very uneasy. doubted the propriety of laying up treasure on earth. The cause of missions stood in need of what I possessed, but still I was restrained. Now I clearly saw that God had provided me with these funds in order to make me willing to obey the call, and to save me from embarrassment in my travels. I could perceive a special reason why I had pressed forward in my studies for so many years, and why revival texts and sermons had occupied so much of my time. That God had been thus preparing me for a few campaigns in Europe. I I arose from my knees under a strong conviction that God had called me to take this tour. Letters were written immediately to Canada, &c. The next day my soul was calm and happy. My books were unpacked, and everything in my study arranged with |