130 first time. On Mr. Bennett's motion, a committee to draw up address appointed ;-said address having been in type the night before; soon ready and produced-as harmless a document as ever was used for shaving paper. Several members, however, had something to say about it. Tommy M'Combie said he felt it his duty to his constituents not to give a silent vote on that occasion; and Miller, as representing the Central Province and the Bank of Victoria, complained that no promise had been given to make that establishment the national bank. (Couldn't hear the exact words, but they were about that size and shape.) Address carried. Hodgson elected Chairman of Committees. He thought it Mitchell asked what about wearing hats in Council. improper. Hodgson understood to say he didn't man to wear his hat, although he didn't think there would be a great deal in it if he did. The matter then dropped, and the house adjourned. -More declarations of qualification. LEGISLATIVE ASSEMBLY.-) Colonel Farquharson summoned members of Assembly to bar of Council Chamber. On their return, Mr. Sargood gave notice that he should, on the following day, move the appointment of Dr. Greeves to be Chairman of Committees. Mr. King gave notice of a like motion, on behalf of Mr. Snodgrass, and Mr. Huffray on behalf of Mr. Vincent Pyke. Mr. Colin Campbel gave notice of a motion for commencing Parliamentary proceedings with prayer. Of course, the motion was not to be carried, but it affords opportunity for a good loud a gry qua rel in the name of religion a thing greatly to be desired. Mr. Sargood gave notice of a foolish motion for the appointment of a committee to enquire whether the institution of cross benches be accordant with Parliamentary usage. Sargood has some reputation for common sense, and ought not to throw it away over such absurdities as this. Uu the motion of Mr. Childers, a bil! regulating the storage of gunpowder, was read a first time, as a matter of form. Why so explosive a bill was chosen for the purpose remained unaccounted for. Mr. Duffy (who seems inclined to be a bit of a bore in this way) delivered a lecture about "the usages of the Imperial Parliament" in the matter of adjournment before deciding on the reply to the speech from the throne. Mr. Fellowes (a man who it is to be hoped means well) attempted some very bad joke about going on a great deal faster here than in England; but as nobody laughed he contented himself with working his body about and wriggling his legs for a quarter of an hour. Eventually, on the motion of Captain Anderson, (who was not only audible in the gallery but half way to the Flagstaff Hill) a committee was appointed to frame a reply (which was framed already, and after some more unimportant business had been gone through the House adjourned. NOVEMBER 26TH. LEGISLATIVE COUNCIL.-Very little for the Council to do to-day, but they made nearly a three hours' job of it, by debating what they agreed to afterwards, and might just as well have agreed to at first-a motion of Mr. Hood's for enquiry into the Penal establishments. t The very sensible resolution of adjourning for a week was very nearly agreed to, but as there was so.. difficulty about the presentation of the address to the Governor, an adjournment to the following day was carried instead. LEGISLATIVE ASSEMBLY.-Most of the members had got their hats and pockets so stuffed with notices of motion that it would be hopeless to attempt enumerating them all in this place. The three candidates for the Chairmanship were duly proposed and seconded, and an unsuccessful attempt was made to obtain the sense of the House upon the He was at first going to subject. Greeves was put to the vote first. do the magnanimous, and vote against himself, but seeing that the division was likely to be a close one, he ran across the floor and recorded a formal expression of his belief that Dr. Greeves was the most fit and proper person, &c. He might as well have been magnanimous, however, as he was unsuccessful, at any rate. Snodgrass was then put in nomination, but (partly in consequence of some row be tween himself and Mr. Mollison, in which the general opinion seemed to be that Snodgrass had woefully misbehaved himself) he was rejected by an overwhelming majority. Pyke was then proposed, and rejected too! Here was a pretty fix. Sargood wanted Pyke and Greeves, as having much the best of the three game, to be allowed to play off, but Murphy wouldn't hear of it, aud decided that each of the three gen. tlemen was finally shut out, House puzzled, and subject dropped. Assembly very nearly in a second fix, on a motion of Mr. Haines appointing days and hours of meeting. Murphy put the question in such a rigmarole of words, about "words proposed to be admitted standing part of the question" and so on, that members divided in a state of extreme uncertainty. The best of the joke was, however, that Duffy, the oracle of Parliamentary usage, before whose experiences, even those acquired by the Speaker on the Mitta Mitta Creek are as nothing, found himself voting on the side he intended to vote against. He was in a sad pucker, and wanted to get across, but was held back by the skirts of his gents' super paletot. Sitting down and putting on his hat, with a very fierce look, he protested against being made to vote against his convictions. Murphy, who thought he had caught the apostle of parliamentary usage tripping, asked whether it was in accordance with the customs of the Imperial Parliament for members to sit speaking with their hats on. Murphy almost subsided iuto his official stockings on being told that it was enjoined upon members in the House of Commons, under such circumstances, to speak sitting, and covered." Before Murphy could recover from the shock of this announcement Duffy managed to have his vote recorded his own way. At the same time he established such a furor for speaking seated and "covered that Mr. Michie was almost afraid to open his lips afterwards, except under the shelter of his hat. The great hat difficulty being set aside, although not finally disposed of, the minor matter of the reply to the Gover..or's speech was entered upon, on the motion of the leathery-lunged Anderson, and a duplicate of the interesting document agreed to the day before in the Upper House was read and adopted. THE OPENING OF PARLIAMENT. BY PLEESMAN X. On November five and twenty, And the osses in the busses Langwidly did krawl along, And the gents did wipe their forrids Wore a rich karnashun hew; And the bars of all the publicks Overflode with thusty soles, On November five and twenty, Wich I meen the M L A's, and I was in the Kounsil Chainber, And wen I beheld them ladies LOCOMOTIVE DUCK PONDS. The Geelong own correspondent of the Argus, speaking of an excursion on the Geolong railway, says "The train conveyed some four or five hundred persons to the Duck Ponds, many of whom availed themselves of the fine weather to take a trip from thence to the summit of Station Peak. Among these were many ladies, who displayed a degree of courage and perseverance which did them credit. The asceut on foot is not by any means an easy and pleasant task; and there was many a spell" required before the holiday tourists reached the summit. Once there, how. ever, they were well rewarded for the exertions they had undergone. We have heard of landslips, of avalanches, of waterfalls-even in the slang of the Auction Mart-of land going up, and, in the case of Melbourne, of the longitude of places dif. fering in a term of years; but the idea of many of the Duck Ponds availing themselves of the fine weather to take a trip," is so entirely novel that we find considerable difficulty in realising it. Among them-the Duck Ponds-were many ladies; a gratifying announcement, to say the least of it. Some valuable particulars, concerning the organism of the Duck Ponds may be gathered from the subsequent lines. Like mountains they have feet; for they went on foot difficult up Station Peak-a somewhat ascent-especially for stagnant water; but, once there, they were rewarded for the exertions they had undergone. So far satisfactory. Then he sends a Seville messuage Haweful grim he lookt, and stately, And a serting members lady (Wich I wery much respex,) Pints to Mister Haines and whispers "That, my love, is Pleesman X." Then the Guvner says "Be seeted, Frends and naybors all, I pray, And jest listen still and payshent Untoe what I've got to say." And he reads a Speech as long and Dull as any lawyer's bill, Promisin to koor the State of Ev'ry mortal kind of ill. And the vet'ran's voice it falter'd The written and spoken dialects of Victoria will soon be as numerous as those of the Italian Peninsula. We have already the English, the Aboriginal, Geelongese, (probably a modification of the Aborigi nal,) Mylesian, and the O'Brienic, which is an amalgam of all four. To these must be added the Kilmoric, of which we find the following interesting specimen in the last number of the Kilmore Examiner. The "basis" referred to by the writer is Jeremy Bentham's definition of the chief objects of geod government : "This must be the basis of every liberal constitution-the ULTIMA THULE, and whatever is drawn from this proposition must be demolished and proved All abstract reasoning must be of a tentative character. and as such, must be subjected to the changes which time and experience will bring forth. Therefore no liberal government, recognising only the happiness of the governed, will be or can be bound by anything but these first principles. The systems of Galileo, Copernicus, and Newton, are separate, yet each was the pioneer to the other, it is with systems of Government. TEMPORA MUTANTUM ET NOS MUTAMUS CUM ILLIS -is a verified fact." So Linguists or philologists competent to render the foregoing passage into English, will be liberally rewarded, on application to Mr. Punch. TOWN TWADDLE. The prize offered by the Industrial Society for the best cabbage doe not include pickled cabbage. A tailor is believed to be the fortunate competitor. The Chinese are making a great stir about the "Capitation Tax"; they have been mischievously informed that the penalty for not paying it is decapitation. Government have announced that a poll will be taken on the subject of this poll-tax, and that anyone objecting to lose his head can demand a poll. We regret to see a spirit of paltry quibbling appear among the members of the Turf Club. The wager that Hotspur only won by a hair is wou, of course. A hair may be three feet long. We do not like personalities applied to private individuals. Mr. Barry, the clown, has retired from the stage, and it was indecently scandalous to say that he writes the letters of Atticus." Mr. Barry possesses fair, ordinary ability. The report has been traced to a forensic M.L.A., who does say severe things sometimes. Mr. W. J. T. Clarke's qualification has been cleared up; the property We are glad to hear that the little doubt that existed respecting has been surveyed by his eldest son the Surveyor-General, and found Childers introduced his Gunpowder Bill in consequence of being "all there." It is reported on good authority that Mr. H. C. E. frightened by a squib on the fifth of November. The suggestion of Major Hodgson, that members of Parliament wearing hats in the House should be greeted with the enquiry "Who's your hatter," has met with general approval. The cross benches are to be kept for the exclusive use of gentlemen at cross purposes, and any one else taking a seat there may be choked on the spot, without benefit of clergy. We have heard that "Master Butterfly" is to be fattened up for Christmas, and is expected to fetch five guineas a pound if he is fat enough. We learn this from the man who came out with him, and who has known Butterfly ever since he was a chrysalis. DOCTOR DULCAMARA AND HIS UNIVERSAL SPECIFICS. DR. DULCAMARA (MR. H-S.)-It is undeniable that every Constitution has defects of more or less importance, and that reforms must be effected to cure them |